Opinion

Always The Victim

Image

I was re-watching ‘The Unit’ and an episode came up that just reminded me of what had happened to me last year. Firstly, The Unit is a great show, unfortunately it got axed but I hadn’t watched it in a couple of years. My perception of the episode a couple years back was completely innocent. But now… it’s just a horrible reminder of what happened a few weeks after my birthday.

Not to leave you all in suspense, but the story, no, the recount I’m about to tell will be given in more detail another time. For now, I just wanted to get it off my chest. I feel like I’ve sort of accepted it, well I accepted it a long time ago but it makes senses now to finally tell someone.

Image

I was on campus at our main library with 3 of my closest friends. It was just the start of the second semester last year and we thought we would be good and start our revisions early. We planned to study til late that day and I really wish I didn’t decide to lie to them and ‘quickly pop out to go meet a friend’. Me and Mr happinesseveryday from sugardaddymeet.com finally set a date to meet and he told me he could only see me in the city at 6pm. That later changed to 7pm and waiting around for his call at central turned it into 7:30pm.

I was being careful, yes it was getting late but the city is a busy place at that hour too. But when we met, he was sitting in his FWD at the carpark and it was freezing. I had a see through top and a pencil skirt on. A threw on my thin grey cardi but that still wasn’t enough. After much banter he convinced me to stay warm in his car. More banter and he convinced me he’d drive us to a coffee shop he knew. I was still naive and didn’t realise where we were going until he pulled into the drive way of a motel on Parramatta Rd.

By then I had started to try and leave. I didn’t know exactly where I was or how I was going to get back but I was scared. He passively persuaded me into his room and before I knew it he wanted my clothes off. We sat there for what felt like hours but was only half an hour going back and forth. I would say ‘no’ but he would go on and on trying to convince me why it makes sense to fuck an obese, 50 year old.

Let’s just say, he couldn’t convince me to screw him willingly, so he screwed me anyway.

Image

I didn’t cry after, I teared up during, but I didn’t cry. I didn’t cry the next day, or a month later. I have yet to waste my tears over it and I have yet to tell anyone. But I did feel disgusting, violated, dirty and unworthy. I blamed myself a lot, I still think if i had just walked away from the very start then I wouldn’t have felt so horrible.

I want others who have gone through the same to speak to someone. Anyone. I’m not strong enough to tell someone personally but I feel my blog is a good start. I don’t want pity from anyone who reads this, I just wanted to get it off my chest for the first time.

Sx

 

Advertisements

Lets Talk Guys

Image

BEFORE YOU READ: Girls only, don’t say I didn’t warn you boys.

Now a days, technology has become such a strong part of sex. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not talking about vibrators, rather dating websites, Facebook, eharmony, Tinder, Blendr, seriously the list is long. It is so easy to add an application onto my phone, sign up, add a few pretty pictures and pick and choose some random guy who is more than happy to, how should I put it, fuck you.

WARNING: I’m not saying all guys are pigs, there’s quite a lot of very nice, genuine, decent guys. But I’m going to have to put it out there, a lot of you are pigs, or will be a pig during some stage of your life. Women, you’re no different too but replace pig with crazy bitch.

Now I wasn’t abused by a male relative or anything like that, I’ve just met so many guys who play the ‘nice guy role‘ all to help themselves not feel like an asshole, while completely screwing with my unguarded feelings. So over the many years of dealing with this, I’ve built a wall. I’m rude, straight forward and bossy, and apparently guys still like that. I tell them to take their pants off, they’ll do it. I tell them to put on my bright pink dress, they’ll do it. I tell them to make a fool out of themselves, they’ll still do it. I don’t understand why, maybe they think I will exchange all this for some sex, maybe they think they have the upper hand. Either way, rude, obnoxious and whiny works better than sweet, soft and cute.

So getting to the point, I don’t have one. I’m just fed up with assholes, nice guys who are really assholes, nice guys who act nice but are unintentionally assholes. It seems I prefer straight forward assholes. The guys who straight up will tell me, I just want sex and I’m going to use you for it. See that’s okay with me. At least he’s warned me, no feelings get in the way. But the ones who talk to you, get to know you, give a little about themselves to you, take you out for lunch, meet your friends, drive you home. It’s those guys you need to watch out for. His intentions will still be sex and using you for it, but he’s too scared of coming off as an asshole so he’ll just act like a gentleman. Then he’ll send you a ‘DICK PIC’ one random morning because this process is taking too long.

At least my sugar daddy’s were straight forward and our arrangements were clear. Plus I got a lot of money out it. These other guys, all I’ve gotten from them is…nothing, well except for Chlamydia.

Sx

Image

Stifler’s Mum (Sugar Mummies)

stiflers-mom

So a friend of mine brought up a rather interesting question, is there a female version of a sugar daddy?

There was always the female sugar daddy option on the websites I visited and used. However because I had signed up as a female sugar baby seeking male sugar daddy I wasn’t able to access the ‘other side‘. But from a lot of Googling and reading stories, I think I’ve gathered enough information to give a general description?

Warning: I may be wrong but I think I’m almost right.

Sugar mummy or more commonly used and known as cougars. I believe there is a slight difference between a sugar mummy and a cougar as well. A sugar mummy is definitely closer to a sugar daddy than a cougar.

A cougar is an older woman who dates younger gentlemen. These relationships can vary a lot, they may involve an arrangement similar to sugar daddies, but more commonly, just a dating or relationship sort of arrangement. A sugar mummy would be more indefinite an arrangement where money is exchanged for time and services (mostly including sex).

Qslnk

Unfortunately, sugar mummies aren’t as popular or well known. As a result when looking for websites similar to the ones I use (except the other way round), there were barely any. The top of Google’s search list is a wedding cake business and the rest were either Facebook pages or American sugar mummy services (still quite low). You’re most likely better off going onto a sugar daddy website and reversing the sign up and search. Male sugar baby searching for a sugar mummy.

Good luck male sugar babies!

Sx

 

A prostitute, an escort and a sugarbaby walk into a bar.

Webster online dictionary defines ‘prostitute’ as ‘ to offer indiscriminately for sexual intercourse especially for money’. Just kidding, I’m not going to be lame.

I can safely say, this time last year, to me, a prostitute, escort or a sugarbaby seemed to be all the same (trading sex for money). I couldn’t careless what the difference was.

I actually learned the difference from talking to the men I ‘worked‘ with. I found a lot of them rather an escort than a prostitute. ‘I don’t want just sex, if I did I would just call a number and book a time. It’s cheaper too.‘. They were more after combing a friend with sex. I’ve also read a number of comments and remarks online upon my research phase that prostitutes are the lowest of the low. I don’t think it’s fair to say that at all. In my opinion, a job’s a job, and who cares if does involve the exchange of money and sex.

Okay, so I’m going to make this easy. A prostitute provides sex or sexual acts in return for money. An escort is hired for a combination of companionship and sex, often costing more for other expenses. And a sugarbaby is the cheaper and beginner version of an escort.

Sx

Secret-Diary-of-a-Call-Girl-artikkel